Wednesday, May 13, 2009

The Days I Found Out

So when I first started my blog and I read other people’s blogs I had it in the back of my head that I wasn’t going to get involved in those “blog carnivals” that some people had. Well… I caved. I wanted to start Lynette Kraft’s Wednesday’s Walk Down Memory Lane. (Yes, I always secretly thought it would be fun). If you want to participate visit http://lynettekraft, I decided that I would this week because May 15 and May 16 are coming up. These two dates are very significant to me. So brace yourselves this is probably going to be really long. Two years ago on Tuesday, May 15 was the day I took a pregnancy test and it came up positive. Two years ago on Wednesday, May 16 was the day that it was “definitely confirmed” that I was pregnant and the day I first saw my little tadpole. I remember that week of my life very well. I remember a few days before the 15th and I remember a few days after the 16th but those days were more of a run together blur. A few days before I found out I remember sitting in the Olive Garden I worked at at the time and I was telling one of the hostesses that I was feeling nauseous lately for some reason. She looked at me and said maybe you are pregnant. And I of course responded NO I’M NOT! The Sunday before the 15th was Mother’s Day. Then on Tuesday I was out with my stepsister and her cousin. We stopped by Walgreens and I decided to pick up a pregnancy test since I hadn’t had my period. I still remember exactly which Walgreens we were at and I remember taking it up to the counter like it was yesterday. I was so casual about. I didn’t give the fact that I was going to take a pregnancy and it could possibly come up positive a second thought. It was no big deal to me. I had taken them before and it always came up negative so why should this be any different?! I was just going to pee on a stick, look at the negative result. Throw the thing away and that would be that. Right? Wrong! Later that night me and my stepsister Marisela got home. We were staying in my dad’s apartment by ourselves at the time. I went to the bathroom and peed on the stick. Waited a few seconds. One line…and then something I had never seen before. There was a faded second line. I called Marisela into the bathroom and told her to LOOK at the thing and tell me what she saw. She told me to take the second test so I did. The same thing showed, there was a clear line and a faded line. We must have been a sight to see. I was in the apartment pacing back and forth and Marisela was sitting on the floor reading the pregnancy test instructions. Then she goes umm, Monica, uh-oh it says here that in a positive result the second line can be faded. “Sooo… what does that mean? I’m f****n pregnant? That’s just great!” I believe that was my exact response. And then on cue Eddie (baby daddy) called me from work. So I started freaking out at that point and he was telling me to calm down and go buy another pregnancy test to make sure. So Marisela and I went to the Wal-Mart up the street and I bought another box of pregnancy tests. This one had 3 in it. But needless to say all 5 of them gave me the same positive result. My stepsister just kept saying to me it’s not for sure until the doctor tells you. But I was pretty positive that I was pregnant. But it still hadn’t hit me. I also remember that night Marisela wanting these two guys to come over. And after the whole ordeal was over she asked if they could still come. I just looked at her and said are you kidding me? No! So I went to sleep and the next morning we woke up and I called my obgyn to make an appointment. I made the appointment for the next week. Then we both went off to work. At least I attempted to. I lost it that morning. I went into work crying and I went straight to the manager and said I thought I could come into work today but I just couldn’t do it because last night I found out that I was pregnant. He said okay, asked me if I was going to be alright to come in the next time I worked and I said yes and he let me go. I remember not knowing what to do. I was such a mess. Eddie of course didn’t have a cell phone at the time. So I went to his work which was down the street and he wasn’t there. Then I went to Marisela’s which was right down the street also. She saw me and saw that I had been crying. She told me to call the doctor and ask if I could get in that day. So I did. I remember them asking me if there was anything wrong and I said no that I just wanted to go in today. Somehow I tracked down Eddie and the 3 of us went to my doctor’s office. We got there and I had to fill out some papers. The whole time Marisela was looking over my shoulder going why are you answering these questions Monica we don’t know if you are pregnant or not. You shouldn’t be answering these questions this is stupid. Yeah she was in complete denial. I finished the paperwork and we went to this small little area where the nurse started asking me questions like when was my last period, what was my family history. Marisela interrupted her and said that I didn’t need to be answering these questions because I was only there to confirm that I was pregnant. Well it was more of a yelling at her than a calm interrupt. The nurse just looked at her and I could tell she wasn’t sure how to respond to that. So I told Marisela to relax. After that I peed in a cup and about 30 seconds after the nurse said yes, that it was “comfirmed” that I was indeed pregnant. Me being the person that I am started laughing. (Yes I get into a hysterical laughing fit when I get nervous and I don’t know what to do.) Eddie tried to hug me but I just told him to not touch me. The doctor came in and talked to me a little bit and said he wanted to do an ultrasound to take a look at the baby and measure it. So two more nurses came in and they did it internally. And I got my first glimpse at my baby girl with her strong heartbeat. I didn’t really say anything because I was still in shock and not sure how to process everything. Marisela was there also and Eddie made this gasping noise when he saw the picture of the baby. One of the nurses laughed and said to him aww are you okay you look like you are about to pass out. The doctor printed out to ultrasound pictures for us, did a pap smear (sp?), made another appointment and the three of us left. (Side Note: Eddie and I went to the appointment a month later and the same nurse that was asking the questions recognized us and said to me, before I recognized her, your friend isn’t here with you this time. I laughed and said no. Then the nurse that took my bloodwork was the same nurse that told Eddie he looked like he was about to faint and she remembered us and started laughing and said something to him again. I thought it was pretty funny that they remembered us because it is a really busy office. I guess we were a sight to see, a scared young mother with two of her young friends with her.) The three of us didn’t say much of anything to each other on the ride back. They were both on their breaks from work so I dropped them both off and drove home. And can you guess what happened to me as I was turning into my housing complex? I got into a car accident! Yep!! LOVELY day I had! The accident was my fault and needless to say the lady in the Jag that I hit wasn’t too happy with me. And I instantly started to cry… no bawl my eyes out would be a better description. I didn’t know what to do! So I called Marisela at work and of course she had to ask me a few times because she couldn’t understand what I was saying. She couldn’t leave work so she called my stepmom and she came. Which I didn’t really want her to do that because I was supposed to be at work and no one knew anything yet. So it was a perfect ending to a wonderful day. That night I called my mom and told her and I slowly began telling the rest of my family. That experience was hard and a lot more happened after that. My pregnancy wasn't easy and I was in labor from Christmas Eve morning until the morning after Christmas. But now I have a beautiful little girl that I love more than anything.

Wow! that was really long...I know if I do anymore Walk Down Memory Lanes they won't be this long. I just wanted to get it out there especially since it's about to be 2 year to the day since this all happened.
Here are a few preggo pictures...
I tried to find the one where I just had a little baby bump but I couldn't find it...

...I was huge, swollen and miserable here. This was only a few days before she was born.

Now a Maddie update. My poor baby doesn't feel good. She slept until almost noon this morning. When I got her up I gave her lunch and some juice to drink. She drank 3 cups of juice, which isn't really unusual for her because she likes her drink. I took her out of her highchair and sat down with her and she was really agitated. Sometimes she does this grunting thing wher she takes a breath and it's like she holds it and then grunts it out. She does this occasionally and I guess I don't really give it much thought. Well, she was sitting with me doing this for a few minutes. And she has never done it like that before so I was thinking maybe she was constipated becuase she has been a little constipated the past few days but I wasn't totally convinced. Then she puked up all of the juice she drank and it got all over me and her. So I got up to change her and she started acting weird and tensing up and then I noticed she was turning blue. Madison has never done anything like that before so I don't know. I called my mom and she said to just watch her and make sure she doesn't do it again because there really isn't much the pediatrician can do. She's been sleeping all day so hopefully she'll feel better and she doesn't do anything like that again!


Sally-Ann said...

What a beautiful little girl!! It is always interesting to hear how others found out they were pregnant!

I hope that your little girl feels better soon, I think you should probably take her to the doctor just to get her checked out.

Kristin said...

My oldest daughter's name is Madison also. Welcome to Wednesday's Walk....I enjoyed reading your story! Hope your little one is feeling better soon.

Lynnette Kraft said...

It's nice to meet you Monica. You and your daughter are both beautiful. Children are such a wonderful gift, aren't they. I just continually praise God for allowing me to be a momma. He's such a loving and faithful God.

Thanks for joining us today.

Kathryn @ Expectant Hearts said...

Thank you for sharing your story.. i"m sure it was a very difficult time for you. And now you have beautiful Madison! What a blessing.